Silence
by Apela
Summary: Haruka walks home alone one night, but then... The next morning, Makoto can't find Haruka anywhere, he's worried. When he hears Haruka is in the hospital, he hurries there with the rest of the swim club. Haruka is fine, except for one thing: he can't speak anymore. Will Haruka ever speak again? RATED M FOR RAPE SCENE AT THE BEGINNING THAT CAN BE SKIPPED, THE REST IS RATED T.
1. Start of Silence

**Story Title: Silence**

**Chapter Title: Start of Silence**

**Chapter Rating: M, T after the first line**

**Warning: EXPLICIT (GAY) RAPE IN THE FIRST PART. In the second part (after '****_Safe from this point_****') only minor coarse language and mentions of rape.**

* * *

On my way home, I passed a man in a black coat. I didn't pay much attention to him at that moment, but only seconds later, I wished I had.

I felt something heavy on my back. I toppled over and fell with my stomach on the rough stone street. I tried to scream in pain, but a hand put a small ball in my mouth and secured the straps attached to it to the back of my head. I was gagged. I struggled, but there was something heavy keeping me down. A body, I realized. I felt something hard poking in my lower back and I grew cold. I could guess what that thing was, and with that, I could guess what he was going to do to me. I struggled harder. That was rewarded with a hard slap to the back of my head that had my face crushing into the ground. Dizzily, I raised my head. The hand appeared again, this time I could see it was gloved. I wondered what it was going to do this time. A black cloth was fit over my and everything went dark.

Stripped of my sight and voice and dizzy, I was pulled upright by two strong, gloved hands. The unknown man grabbed both my hand in one of his and dragged me along to God knows were. After walking for what seemed like an hour, but probably was only a few minutes, we stopped. He pushed me against something rough. A tree. He tied my hands above my head and then completely disappeared from my senses. I tried the bonds. They were tight and strong. There was no way I was going to break them of get them loose. To my horror, I then noticed I couldn't move my arms. He tied my hands to something.

I felt a wet, warm patch appearing in my pants. Then, my captor spoke for the first time. "Scared, aren't ya?" His voice was low and deep and made me shudder with fear. This man was evil, I could feel it. "Dontcha worry, I'll be nice to ya, well, as far as I can be nice." He laughed. A hollow, scary laugh that went all the way down my spine.

He straddled me. I felt him tear my shirt open and pull my pants down. Then he stopped. "What's this? Swimming trunks? You're a swimmer then, aren't ya?" He let his hands rest on my cock and then pulled my trunks down as well, leaving me completely exposed to the world. His hands disappeared from my body for a moment and when they returned they went straight to my cock. He had pulled off his gloves, I felt, and now it were warm, rough hands touching me.

Despite the fear and to my own dissatisfaction, the way he played with my cock made me go hard. As soon as he considered me hard enough, I felt something slip down my cock, all the way to the base, and stay there. "Come on boy, I hope you enjoy a little SM, 'cause I do." I froze. I knew just fine what SM was, and also knew I would absolutely hate it. I started struggling as hard as I could, but the struggling only made me graze my wrists.

"Ya don't like it? Too bad, or I'd show ya a piece of heaven."A collar was fitted around my neck and something clamped down on my nipples. I screamed in pain, but with the gag, it came out as a muffled groan. My legs got tied so that I couldn't stretch them any more. I had already become limp again from pain. I got rolled onto my knees and without warning, I felt my insides explode. His cock quickly trust in and out quickly, never pausing. My insides ripped and I felt something warm drip out of my ass. I raised my head in an instinctive attempt to get away, but this only caused my nipples to be pulled painfully. I was writhing in pain, trying to scream but unable to. And then I felt a sharp pain on my back. And again, and again. He had a whip, and he was hitting me with it. I was sure every hit drew blood. I felt more and more light-headed. Slowly, I faded into darkness. I vaguely noticed his cum spurting into me before completely passing out.

* * *

_**Safe from this point.**_

* * *

I was staring out the classroom window. I was worried about Haru-chan. Normally, I'd go to Haru-chan's house in the morning to drag him out of the bathtub and to school, but today he hadn't been home. I had been late, so I'd figured Haru-chan must have gotten out of the tub himself for once and gone to school on his own. When I arrived at school though, Haru-chan hadn't been there. Now lessons were nearly starting and I still had no idea where he could be. I promised myself to skip class and go searching for him if he hadn't turned up by the end of the lesson.

I got dragged out of my thoughts by the arrival of Miss Ama-chan. One look at her face and I was even more worried. Instead of her usual innocent smile, she wore a sad expression. Nothing could have happened to Haru-chan, right? "Ehm... class, before we start today. Nanase Haruka won't come to school for a few days and when he returns, I want no one to press him to talk about where he has been." She hesitated for a bit, thinking of what else she had to say, but she came up empty. "Then, let's start the lesson." I released a breath that I didn't know I had been holding. I realized I had feared the worst when Miss Ama-chan walked into the classroom like that. Haru-chan was alive, though I was still wondering what had happened to have him take leave from school. I figured I'd ask Ama-chan about it at the end of the lesson.

I couldn't concentrate for the rest of the lesson. I tried, but everytime my thoughts drifted off to Haru-chan. What had happened? Was Haru-chan alright? I looked at the clock for the xth time. Time was going far too slow at the moment. When the bell finally rang, I sprinted to Miss Ama-chan and called out to her.

"Miss Ama-chan, is Haru-chan alright? What happened to him? Is it bad?"

Miss Ama-chan bit her lip. "Sorry Tachibana-kun, the teachers have decided to keep quiet about what happened out of respect for Nanase-kun. I can tell you though, that he is currently in the hospital and will probably be released later today, depending on his mental state."

"The hospital here in town?"

She nodded and then seemed to ponder about something. "Maybe it's better if you go see him now. I'll notify the school." She waved me out before calling me back when she thought of something. "You might want to take Hazuki-kun, and maybe Ryuugazaki-kun as well, though I'll leave the choice to you."

I thought for a bit. It was only fair to take Nagisa, since he knew Haru-chan as well as I did. Rei-chan wasn't as close to Haru-chan, but remembering how well they got along, I decided to take him too. Ama-chan had said something about Haru-chan possibly being mentally unfit to leave the hospital. If that was the case, Rei-chan might be of help. They were in the same class, so it wouldn't take more time to find Rei-chan too.

"I'll go get them both, I hope you can notify the school of them as well."

She nodded and I left. I quickly went to their classroom, almost running. Class had already started by the time I arrived at their classroom's door, so I knocked.

"Come in"

I stuck my head through the doorway. "I'd like to speak to Nagisa and Rei-chan." Oops. Rei turned red at hearing his nickname and a few of his classmates chuckled. Well, I'd worry about that later, Haru-chan comes first!

"Is it important enough to interrupt my lesson for it?" the teacher inquired.

"Yes, very important."

The teacher signaled the two that it was okay for them to leave, and they stood up to leave the classroom.

"Take your bags, we're probably leaving."

They looked at me incredulously and the teacher, who, by chance, looked like a gorilla and also just as strong as one, glared at me.

"I do not approve of students leaving in the middle of class, unless there is an emergency."

"Miss Amakata has given me permission to leave and take these two with me. It is not an emergency, I think, but it is very important."

The teacher gritted his teeth, but, seeing my serious expression, waved Nagisa and Rei-chan out of the classroom. They almost ran out of the classroom. As soon as they had closed the door behind them, Rei-chan opened his mouth. "What the hell! Do you want to get us killed, Tachibana-senpai?! Next time we've got lessons of Gorilla he'll torture us. Where is Nanase-senpai anyway? If you want us two to come with you, you'd probably want him to come too, right?"

Nagisa put one and one together before I could answer Rei-chan. "Something happened to Haru-chan, right? Please tell me he'll be okay Mako-chan!"

They quickly put their books in their bags (they had just grabbed them from their tables when they had escaped out of the classroom), while I told them what I knew.

"Haru-chan is in the hospital. It is not life-threatening. According to Miss Ama-chan he'll probably be released later today. She still felt it was necessary for us to go see him. I don't know what happened to him, she wouldn't tell me. But from what she told me, I gathered it must be something horrible."

All blood drained from Nagisa's face at the last sentence, and he quickly put his bag on his back and dragged us out of the school. We took the shortest route to the hospital and immediately went to the reception.

"Nanase Haruka? Let's see..." A smiling-but-actually-bored receptionist quickly searched the system.

"May I ask what relation you have to Mister Nanase?"

"He's our friend and my classmate."

"Might I see your identification?"

I thought it was weird that I had to show my ID, but figuring there would be a good reason for these precautions I showed her my ID, the others following my lead.

She filled in something on her computer before turning back to us.

"Mister Nanase is in room 291. Just go to the the second floor and take the third corridor to the right. It is the second to last room on the left side.

"Can you tell me what happened to him? We couldn't get a lot of information at school."

She glanced at her computer. "It says he got raped. He is only lightly injured, but he seems to have some mental problems. Since you know him, please tell the doctor any changes in his behaviour after you've seen him"

We all froze. Rape. The one thing we hadn't expected to ever happen to any of us. Well, except for Nagisa maybe, who was considered pretty cute. But for Haru-chan to get raped... None of us had expected that. We gave a quick thank you to the receptionist and hurried to Haru-chan's room. When we got to the door, we stopped. I slowly raised my fist and knocked on the door. There was no answer, but I still slowly opened the door.

Looking into the room, I saw Haru-chan sitting upright in the bed. He was wearing a hospital gown and had an IV connected to his wrist. Considering the color of the liquid, he probably lost quite a lot of blood. His wrists were bandaged, as was his neck. I couldn't see if there were any more injuries under his sleeping gown. He had a sketch book and a pen in his hand, but wasn't drawing at the moment. Instead, he was staring at us. At first, he looked confused, but after a few seconds a thin smile appeared on his face. The normal Haru-smile that was invisible to anyone but me, and sometimes to Nagisa. One look at his sketchbook told me that his drawings were normal as well; he was currently drawing yet another version of Iwatobi-chan. It seemed that his mental problems weren't as far-reaching as I had feared.

"I heard what happened, Haru-chan. Are you alright?"

He moved his head in a way that I recognized as meaning 'more or less.'

I walked into the room, Rei-chan following me and Nagisa shuffling behind him, clearly not knowing how to act towards Haru-chan at the moment. I was less tense. I had already relaxed quite a bit. Haru-chan wasn't heavily scarred by what happened. I was sure that whatever mental problems this might have caused, they weren't anything that would seriously bother him in his daily life.

There were only two chairs in the room, so I sat down on the edge of Haru-chan's bed while Nagisa and Rei-chan sat down on the chairs.

"Do you want to talk about it, or do you rather keep it to yourself?" I asked carefully. I had always heard that it was better for a rape-victim to talk what happened, but I didn't want to force him. I realized something wás wrong with Haru-chan when he, instead of answering, flipped over the page of his sketchbook and started writing. Before I could ask about that, he already held it up so we could read what he had written;

**The doctor told me it was best if I told someone, and I'd like to tell you, if you don't mind.**

All color drained from my face. "That's fine, Haru-chan, we're happy to help." I saw the slightly fearful expression on his face, probably caused by my pale face, and I realized it would do more harm than good to not ask the one question that was burning on all our lips.

"Haru-chan, can't you talk?"

Haru-chan just shook his head.

* * *

**Okay, my first non-hetalia fanfic. That doesn't say much when I only have put one fanfic online, but it does say something when you know that I've got another hetalia-fanfic almost ready to be put up, another I'm currently writing, and a 3-chapter smut-fanfic that I'm planning to write. Now I'm seriously worried about my update speed... Anyway, back to this fic.**

**Iwatobi Swim Club is the first anime other than Hetalia I'm following, not just watching after it has been finished. Normally, I don't like writing fanfics for unfinished anime/manga, Hetalia being an exceptions because almost all chapters can be read seperately. Still, the idea for this fic got into my head and didn't leave before I had written it. So, here it is! I hope you like it.**

**For yaoi-fans: No more yaoi here, at least not for a long time. I might put in some RinxHaru or HaruxRin towards the end of the story, but only if it's a logical development. All chapters from here will be rated K-T until the possible yaoi-smut.**

**Also, English is not my native language, so if you find odd sentences or grammar/spelling mistakes, please tell me. And of course; please rate&review!**


	2. I'm Not Broken

**Story title: Silence**

**Chapter title: I'm Not Broken**

**Rating: T**

**Warnings: Mentions of rape**

* * *

When I woke up. The first thing I noticed was the pain. The second thing was that the man was gone, and so were the bonds. I slowly sat up. I was a bit dizzy and in a lot of pain, but it was bearable. I looked down at myself. I was naked. My wrists were black and blue and there was dried blood on the grass beneath me. I could guess where that blood came from. My clothes were next to me. My shirt was ripped apart, but my swimming trunks and pants were still intact. I grabbed them and tried to put them on, but thought the better of it when a sharp pain shot through my back. It seemed my worst injuries were where I couldn't see them.

I looked around me. I was in the park. As I had expected, it was a few minutes away from the place I had been attacked. I realized I had to get away from this place; nobody passed through the park in the morning, so if I stayed here, I might not be found until school was done and the students would come here to hang around with friends. It was still early, around four I guessed, so no one would pass by anytime soon. I tried to stand up, but I felt my legs giving way beneath me, so I crawled.

I had only crawled a few meters when I heard someone approaching. I turned my head to see a student walking towards me. He was wearing headphones and reading a book. He clearly hadn't seen me yet. I tried to scream "help me", but my voice wouldn't come out. He came closer and closer. He still didn't see me. I crawled to the side of the road and pulled his trousers when he passed by me. He finally looked up from his book and dropped it when he saw me. "Are you alright?"

I tried to say that it was quite obvious I wasn't, but again, my voice wouldn't come out. He took of his jacket and put it around me. I was grateful to him; I hadn't noticed it before, but I was really cold. Then he let his bag shift off his back and started rummaging in it. He found his mobile phone quite quickly and called the police.

"Hello? I found a naked man here. I think he was raped. What? Ah, yes, he is concious." His voice was trembling. "No, I don't know him. Yes, I'll ask. Yes, thank you" He put the phone away and squatted next to me. "Uhm...hello?" he said carefully "The ambulance is on it's way, it'll be here in no time. Can you tell me your name?" By now, I had realized I couldn't talk for some reason. I pointed at my throat and mouthed "I can't speak" in the hope of getting the message across. "Is something wrong with your voice?" I nodded. He grabbed his bag again and this time pulled out a pencil and a notebook. "Can you write it down?" As an answer, I took them and wrote down my name.

**Nanase Haruka**

"Nanase Haruka?" I nodded. "Well, Nanase-kun, is there something I can do for you? Do you want something to drink?" I nodded again and he pulled out a bottle of water from his bag and gave it to me. I drunk from it. The cold water felt heavenly against my sore throat. I gave him back the now half-empty bottle and he put it back.

We sat there silently for a few minutes; he not knowing what to say, I unable to speak. Then the ambulance finally arrived. A man got out and checked if I had broken anything, then he and the student helped me up and into the ambulance, where someone immediately wrapped a warm blanket around me. The man got out again to pick up my clothes and then the ambulance started moving. During the ride, the student told them what I had told them. Then they started asking me questions about my health and if there was someone that needed to be contacted. I answered them the best I could using the notebook I still was holding.

When we arrived at the hospital, I immediately got taken inside and was brought to a small room with two police agents and a doctor in it. The first thing they did was take a sample of the semen that still was in my ass. The agents asked me some questions about what happened and who had attacked me, and I wrote down the answers. When they were finished, they left. To my horror, they took the notebook with them, saying that they needed it. Now I was left without a way to communicate.

A nurse came in when the doctor called her and she took me to a shower. She let me sit down on a special chair and washed me. I realized that it wasn't by chance a female nurse had come in. No one would like to be washed by a male nurse after being raped by someone of the same gender, especially when some 'private spots' had to be cleaned. After the shower, I felt clean. It felt amazing. I had never thought that being clean could feel so good.

The nurse gave me some white underwear she had picked from a closet and brought me back to the doctor (who was female too by the way). The doctor cleaned and bandaged my wounds and put ointment on the bruises that had formed. The nurse appeared again when she was finished, this time with a hospital gown. I put it on while the doctor explained that I had probably lost quite a bit of blood, and I would be given a IV to make sure I would be alright. They wanted to test me on STDs and HIV as well before discharging me. They took some blood for that and the nurse put me in a wheelchair (although I was quite sure I could walk now) and rode me to a small, single person room and put me in bed.

A little later, two nurses came in. One gave me a sketchbook and a pen, thank God and the other brought an IV. She put the needle in my wrist while she told me that no signs of STDs had been found, though I would have to wait about a week for the definitive results. I took the sketchbook and pen from the other nurse.

**Thank you**

"You're welcome" she said, smiling. "You'd better try to get some sleep, you look tired." I nodded and put the sketchbook next to the bed on some kind of metal nightstand on wheels. The nurses left and I laid down. I thought about what happened and my reaction to it. Other people would probably cry and scream when it would happen to them. I hadn't screamed or cried. They said people often felt ashamed and filthy afterwards, but I had only felt filthy, and that feeling had disappeared after I had showered.

What has happened has happened, there is no use crying over spilled milk. Why would people be overly emotional about it? It had somehow still gotten to me though; what the doctor had said had made it clear that my silence wasn't caused by my injuries. That meant it was probably all psychically. It was weird how something I didn't care about in my head could still affect my body so much. I shifted and tried to fall asleep. It was harder than I had expected; I was craving for a dive in the pool or a soak in the bathtub. I hoped that I'd have a chance later that day. In the end though, I fell asleep.

I woke up only a few hours later. I just suddenly was wide awake, no reason. I didn't feel like sleeping any more, so I took the sketchbook and started drawing. I drew the first thing that came to mind, and that was Iwatobi-chan. Iwatobi-chan was so cute. I decided to make a new design of him, an even cuter one. At first, I made the eyes bigger, like a chibi. It looked horrible.

It took a lot of experimentation, but finally I managed to draw an improved version of the adorable mascott. I had made the wings fluttier, the tummy rounder and put a few loose feathers on his head. I thought it was still recognizable as Iwatobi-chan and it was a lot cuter than the original version. I decided to try to make this the official version of our school's mascott.

I was just thinking about that when I heard someone knocking on the door. I'd like to have said "Come in", but I couldn't, so I stayed quiet and waited for the door to open. All guys from the club had come. How they heard about it, I didn't know. I guessed they had heard from school, that I had asked to be contacted. Makoto looked alright, just a bit nervous, Rei was a bit pale, but also alright. Nagisa didn't look too well though, as if he'd seen a ghost, or three. I knew it was shocking to hear a friend had been raped, but Nagisa was overreacting. I was the one that had been raped and he was more shocked than I was.

I talked for a bit with Makoto and he asked me if I wanted to talk about what happened. The doctor had told me that it would help and I would do a lot to recover my voice faster, so I wrote down that I wanted to. Makoto's pale face told me that was the wrong answer. Of course, no one liked to hear such stories. I was just going to write down that I wouldn't tell if they didn't want to hear it, when Makoto asked me. "Haru-chan, can't you talk?" I nodded. When Makoto's face grew even paler, I realized that he had been shocked by my silence, not my request. "Well, uhm...tell us then" he said, clearly uncomfortable. I started writing. Sentence by sentence, I wrote down my story. I started with quite a bit of detail, but I left out all detail when I saw Nagisa was close to having a panick attack. It took only a little over half an hour. As soon as I was finished, they left. They said I needed my rest, but I think they needed some time to digest what they just heard, it was quite a heavy story after all.

They left, and I was left alone again. I picked up my sketchbook, but had no inspiration. I put it back and laid down, looking up at the ceiling. I was bored, very bored. Immediately, images of pools and the ocean popped up in my head. I really hoped they'd discharge me soon so I could swim again. I thought of water so long, I could almost feel it. I was almost at the point that I'd start swimming frontcrawl in the bed when someone knocked on my door again. Two men came in who I recognized as the policemen that had asked me some questions earlier that day.

They both took a seat and stared at me with a dark face. I could tell that it was serious. "We have an idea who might have raped you." I looked at them expectantly. "Well, we don't know his identity, but we think it was a serial rapist." A serial rapist, okay, I didn't see the importance of it all yet. Serial rapist or one-time rapist, what did it matter? "To be more precise, a serial rapist who likes to rape his victims multiple times. One of his other victims was raped five times before we put her under protection." Ah, so that was why it was serious. I picked up my sketchbook and pen.

**Is there something I can do about it?**

"Just don't walk alone, especially not after dark. Lock your doors and windows, or even better, stay with a friend or some family so you're not alone at night, I heard you were living alone." Then, both policemen stood up. "Sorry, we can't do anything else, except for hope we catch that guy soon."

**Thank you**

And so, they left. I was alone again. I remembered the student that had found me. I wondered what had happened to him.

* * *

**Hello everyone! I knew what I wanted to put in this chapter, but I just had no motivation for it. I still finished it quite quickly because of all the follows and two dear reviewers 3 I'd like to reward you two by writing a fanfic for you, but I'm accepting prompts anyway... so it isn't that much of a reward. I'm currently on vacation BTW, so I'm typing this on my iPod. And because auto-correct sucks, I have no spelling checker. To make it even worse: in a few days we're going to switch to a place without wi-fi, so I won't be able to upload anything! But well, you can expect a shitload of chapters when I get back, I hope.**

**Please tell me if you liked this chapter, since I myself have some mixed feelings about this one.**


	3. Announcement

**Hello everyone,**

**Sorry for being silent for over a month, but I've been busy with school (it's my exam year). Also, I realized when I finally got to writing again that I have no plan whatsoever for my stories; I know some things will happen, but not when and how it will happen. Because of this, I've decided to first write a plot outline for my stories, and only then continue writing.**

**For Last Gift and Silence, I will write the plot outline and make some minor changes to the existing chapters. The story till now will hardly change (or maybe it will, if the plot requires it). Full Bloom though is going to be rewritten. The focus will stay on the current characters, but the story will change. I might change the title too, since I feel this one just doesn't really fit.**

**I will also start writing some new fanfics. I won't post them until I have a decent amount of chapter and a plot outline though (I learn from my mistakes). These fanfics include but are not limited to a songfic dump, a long Hikaru no Go fanfic and the promised FrUk PWP.**

**Please be patient with me! I've never put any of my stories online before this, so it's trial and error for me.I hope that you all will continue reading my stories when I get back.**

**Apela**


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